Florida Governor Ron DeSantis is unapologetically defending the state's new illegal immigration detention facility deep in the Everglades, pushing back against what he called laughable complaints and political theater from Democrats and illegal aliens alike.

At a press conference in Gainesville, DeSantis torched critics of the detention center — which detractors have dubbed “Alligator Alcatraz” — dismissing their objections over conditions as unserious and dishonest.

“So, they’re making these claims and they’re saying oh they [illegals] are not fed well. Well, first of all, they’re fed the same that the staff is fed,” DeSantis said. “It’s not a prison, it’s a deportation processing center. So, it is different.”

The governor didn’t hold back on the absurdity of some of the complaints.

“They were mad that the ham sandwiches weren’t toasted. Excuse me? I mean, give me a break,” he scoffed.

DeSantis made it clear: illegal aliens are not being mistreated, and Democrats are grandstanding in an effort to vilify a state that refuses to bend to open-border insanity.

“You have these representatives... they’re just trying to get some notoriety, so they are making these claims,” he said, adding that the Department of Homeland Security is overseeing facility requirements and would handle any credible legal concerns — if there even are any.

“Everyone’s the same there,” the governor reaffirmed. “It’s not like Florida prisons where inmates get different meals than staff. Here, it’s equal.”

Kevin Guthrie, Executive Director of Florida’s Division of Emergency Management, also chimed in during a fiery appearance on Jesse Watters Primetime, where he exposed the theatrical antics of Democrat lawmakers during a recent bipartisan facility tour.

More than 60 lawmakers descended on the site, but not all came with honest intentions, according to Guthrie.

“Absolutely,” he said when asked if some were there just to stir up controversy. “One of my favorites was an individual who had an infrared thermometer and pointed it at a light bulb. And it was 110 degrees. I said, ‘Let’s actually pull that down to where the ambient air is at, and not point it at the light bulb.’”

Among the more comical gripes? The bathroom. Democrats allegedly took issue with the standard lock-up toilet setup, something Guthrie quickly debunked.

“This is a standard restroom for any secure facility,” he explained. “There’s a sink, there’s a toilet... that’s what people do.”

And then there was the “gray turkey sandwich” scandal, launched by none other than Florida Democrat Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz, who reportedly called the meal “gray” without even opening the wrapper.

“She was about six feet away from the turkey sandwich box, that was in a wrapper,” Guthrie said. “So I don’t know how she could tell it was gray. But let’s be honest — hospital food, school lunches under Michelle Obama’s program — it’s the same thing. Nobody’s getting filet mignon.”

While Democrats continue to obsess over the color of turkey meat and the temperature of light bulbs, Gov. DeSantis is staying focused on the real issue: protecting Florida from the federal government’s border disaster.

This isn’t about comfort — it’s about law, order, and sovereignty.